Elūl

is a photographic and written work made between 2012 and 2014, tracing the emotional arc of a romantic relationship, from the intensity of falling in love through rupture, estrangement, and the difficult and painful work of returning to myself. The photographs were made unselfconsciously, as a way of connecting to her and surviving what I was living through. The images were the healthiest part of our relationship, a refuge for us both, and left unexamined for years. Returning to them was an entirely different experience: they had become mirrors, showing me not only her part in the difficulty but mine.

The project came together with her consent and encouragement. It was developed into an intimate hand-sewn photobook and launched at Photo London in May 2025.

Although deeply personal, it is universal. Elūl is not a portrait of another person or a composite of two, which is indeed closer to what a photograph is. It is an exploration of perception itself: how we see, what we attach to, and how relationships function as mirrors for our inner lives, and opportunities to break unhelpful patterns. Love appears here not as resolution, but as action: a site of learning, destruction, creation, and insight into the self.

The book draws on photography and psychology to explore questions many of us recognise and struggle with: the power of the camera as window, shield, and bridge, and images as mirrors. Then, psychologically, why are we drawn to particular people, and what do we find when we stop projecting and look honestly at ourselves? It is grounded in the idea that the self is responsible for the development of the self, and proposes that sometimes, like pyrophytic plants, our seeds of growth require fire to be released.

Published in 2025 as a first edition of 100 hand-sewn copies, Elūl asks what it means to look honestly at ourselves, and to take responsibility for what we carry forward.